Relevant, if annoying, Renfrew aphorism. I'm too tired to be with people right now. I can barely manage myself.
I like to compare eating disorders to addictions like alcoholism. It makes sense to me. But I can't imagine an alcoholic feeling like such a failure for maintaining recovery, for pursuing health. I feel like a failure so often, like I lack the adequate discipline to starve or purge or waste away, like I'm no longer strong enough to have a singular obsession.
This post is not coherent.
I'm so tired.